OK so you know I love BuzzFeed, I want to work on BuzzFeed and create such great content, but sometimes, as it happens in even the best of relationships, I don’t agree with them: or in this case the bloggers/makeup artists and digital influencers and their beauty hacks.
Today we’re going to take out sometime and talk about XX Beauty Hacks That DON’T Work For Me. Maybe I didn’t do it right. Maybe I suck. Or Maybe I think the term Beauty Hacks means saving time.
- Use a Credit Card To Do a Cat Liner!I mean, REALLY? Really? ReALlY? I don’t know about you but I love my Credit Card (singular) more than it loves me. It is the only thing that saves me from appearing broke (when I am) and buys me an UBER when I want. Sure, I pay my own bills (where are you, sugar daddy?) but I cannot, cannot, keep it lying around my dresser or my bathroom, next to that kajal stick and used cotton swab. What if I get the liner on my CC? What if the amount of gunk it has on it after being swiped hundreds of times gives me a sty? Will I wear my cat liner to the
NO. So let’s change this. Stick to visiting cards (some are very sharp) or use anything angular. Bobbi, you know Bobbi right? Bobbi Brown says you should just push your eyelid in the angle you want your wing to be. She’s a PRO!
- Stain your eyelash curler to line your eyes as you curl your eyelashes!That one is a tongue twister. I think eyeliners are all about precision which is why they take time. Ever heard women cribbing about normal thick lines? NO! Because that’s not the problem. The problem is to match it to the angle of your eyes with precision and cleanliness. If you’re even a bit OFF in placing the curler, some other part of your eye will get the liner. And if you less liner on your curler, then you’ll have to fill out the eyeliner anyway. I don’t know guys, like this is not really a hack for me.
- Use a business card to get your mascara right!
First up, I’m really thankful that there was no mention of Credit Cards or I would have just dropped the mic. Or in this case, hit ‘do not save’. First up, do you really need a hack to apply your mascara? You have been doing this since you were 13 or 16 or 21. Do you really get it on your eyelids? It could be because it’s clumpy and not because you suck at it. The hack which was originally from YouTube Star, Michelle Phan actually shows her outlining and cutting up a business card in the shape of her eye, and THEN, using it to apply a mascara. This requires some homework, and patience, so definitely NOT for me. I usually do this in the cab. On New Delhi’s crooked roads.
4. Use your expensive eyeshadow pallette, freakkin’, Urban Decay to even out your hairline! This beautiful woman, who also goes up by the handle, Klumsy Closett talks about how she’s had an uneven hairline and she uses a very expensive looking, MATTE eyeshadow to go through her entire head. So, I’m all for makeup, and all of us feeling like BABES, but I think this is a bit too much. I don’t know why you’d care so much (unless you’re walking the ramp or being photographed), I’m requesting you not to be so conscious. Use good things on your hair: aloe vera gel, almond oil, coconut oil and let your hair regrow. Also stop tying your hair up so tightly–just chill and you’ll look beautiful!
Thank you for reading guys! I hope you know this post is all in fun, and I still love BuzzFeed Beauty.
Follow us on Pinterest for more such updates!
We are taking our Alexa rank to the next level with Blogchatter. With the advent of this wonderful #MyFriendAlexa campaign, we hope to connect and hone a new community, build more relationships and read more. Our reading hashtag is #beforbeautyreads.